well that was weird

i had an odd morning a few weeks ago and since then have had a few people ask me if i was going to post it on my blog or not. i debated writing about it because there's so much of it i don't remember - but in the end, i figured i'd tell you what i could and link you to the rest of the story.

It was Inauguration morning. I'm sitting on my couch and i start to not feel very well. i don't know how to describe it, kind of like feeling that something just wasn't right. my head felt really fuzzy, my heart was pounding and i just felt funny inside. it was alarming enough that i had the thought to call aaron and tell him that something was wrong. At this point i looked around the room and realized Noah wasn't there with me. I started calling for him and running around the house looking for him. As i realized he wasn't in the house i started to panic. i tried to think of where he could be or what we had been doing but my mind was... blank. i called aaron in a panic and told him i couldn't find noah. he asked if he was at my friends house (we'll call her "Megan") because i had told him earlier i would be over there. not giving it a second thought, i grabbed reagan and drove over to megans'. (i should note that she lives 4 houses away - but in an emergency, a car seemed faster then walking with a one-year old.)

By now I'm crying and am in a total panic as i knock on Megan's door.

bits of this part are blurry, but i believe the conversation went something like this:

Me: Is Noah here?

Megan: (with a confused look) yes. you just left him here a few minutes ago.

Me: (more confused then Megan and much more scared) what? i just left him here? i was here?

Megan: Brenda, you left here about 15 minutes ago. you spent the morning here.

Me: What?

Megan: I think you should come and sit down.

Apparently, i had spent the past few hours of that morning with Megan and her girls and had left to change Reagans diaper. I left Noah there to play. But, I have no memory of that morning. i have no memory of being at Megan's house or talking with her girls. the morning was completely gone from my memory. at some point i do remember my father-in-law showing up to take the kids and shortly after Aaron came. I vaguely remember sitting by Megan on her couch (she claims there was some petting of her hair going on... i guess i should be grateful it stopped there)

the last memory i have at her house is standing by the door while aaron is saying something about an insta-care. while he's talking her oldest daughter walks in the room and i remember hugging her and telling her how good it was to see her. at this point aaron says he's going to take me to the hospital - evidently she had been in the room a few minutes before and i had been hugging her and telling her the same thing then.

so, from here, my memory is much more stable. we get to the hospital and they take me right in. by far the most embarrassing moment (if you don't count the petting with Megan, but i don't remember that so it doesn't really count) is sitting on the bed trying to convince the nurse i wasn't on drugs.

nurse: what pills have you taken this morning?

me: i don't know, i don't remember. but if it was anything it would be my bc and an ibuprofen.

nurse: ok... is there ANYTHING else you could have taken?

me: No.

nurse: look, we're not going to tell the police, but we need to know so we can do our jobs.

me: seriously, i'm not on drugs. i really didn't take anything.

nurse looks me up and down with a doubtful look

aaron: (seeing the nurse look at me) she went to the gym this morning.

at this point i look down and see my gym clothes next to aaron (i was in a lovely hospital gown) and realize what i must look like. my exposed legs had not been shaved for about 2 weeks (totally gross, i know, but it's winter - come on), i had yesterdays make-up smeared on my eyes and my hair was plastered to my head in all sorts of unflattering ways (i'd been wearing a hat all morning, but evidently they made me take it off).

me: i know i look bad, but really, i don't do drugs

aaron: besides, we can't afford 'em.

by now the neurologist has come in and after hearing me tell what happened says he's 99% sure i had what is called Global Transient Amnesia.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/transient-global-amnesia/DS01022

this is where the person looses about 6 hours of their memory. one minute they're fine and the next they have no memory of what they've been doing. there are many symptoms to it - one being a "powerful expression of emotion" (which would explain the hugging and petting of Megan)

after the MRI came back clean (no stroke) the doctor officially diagnosed me with GTA and said i'd be fine. apparently, it's a very rare occurrence and never happens twice.

the doctor said it can happen from a hit to the head, a major trauma or it does come in the form of a migraine. he suspects because i'd been having a lot of headaches as of late that the latter reason was most likely.

i think, due to the timing, it was because of a major trauma. democrats officially taking over - very traumatic indeed...

even though some of my closest friends are democrat.

i even like Obama


My friend, Megan, has posted the experience on her blog for those of you who'd like to hear more of the details from that morning.... from her point of view. (no matter what she says about the whole "petting" incident - i think she liked it) http://3greenwoodgirls.blogspot.com/2009/02/well-that-was-weird.html

perfectly good reasons

i know it seems crazy, but i have good reasons.

being the neurotic mother that i am, which is something i've never denied, i felt it was necessary to get noah his own cell phone.

(pausing while most of you roll your eyes and the rest of you verbally mock me. go ahead, get it all out of your system)

ok then, when noah started 1st grade we let him walk home with some of his friends. it's just under 1/2 a mile and in a safe neighborhood. for me to follow him home from a distance would not have gone over well with these very independent children. but the crazy thoughts that ran through my head while he was walking home were bordering obnoxious - even for me. too often they would be 5-10 minutes late getting home, for various reasons: stopping to tie shoes and becoming distracted with a line of ants, arguing about who's in charge of the group and being unable to walk and argue at the same time - or simply sitting down half-way home to take a break. whatever the reason - i decided i couldn't handle wondering what was going on when they were running behind.

so, i convinced aaron the best solution was to get noah a glorified walkie-talkie... aka: a cell phone. to my credit - i did look into the kind that just has four programmable buttons, but it was cheaper to just add a line to our cell phone plan. to say the least, noah loved the idea of having his own phone. shockingly - it went straight to his head. i pulled up one day after school to find Emma (his carpool buddy) holding his backpack for him. i asked him what was going on and his response was "i have a cell phone now and i need to have my hands free to answer it".

yeah - that didn't go over well. thankfully, noah now understands two important things - 1. he does not have girls carry his back pack. 2. the phone does not come out of the back pack unless there's an emergency. sad noah. grateful emma.

as for reagan getting a cell phone when she turns 6... definitely. along with some mace, a panic button of some sorts and maybe even a taser gun for good measure. aaron has already ordered his night vision goggles for when she starts to date.

Christmas

i know this is about 4 weeks late - but i figured it's better late then never.

Christmas morning started out beautiful. Aaron was able to get these shots early that morning of the sun coming up outside our window. we really do live in a beautiful place.

 

 

 

As far as presents, Christmas was pretty small this year - more like a couple of small presents and one big family present. Noah wanted a wii for Christmas. we told him if he saved $100 of his own money we'd pay the rest and get him one for Christmas.

throughout the year, to help him be responsible, we'd find ways for him to yearn money through chores and helping with Reagan. Aaron's parents helped him earn money by paying him for just being so cute. - oh, yes, he learned a lot of responsibility that way. :) actually, they did pay him $25 for not drinking soda for two months. i didn't think he drank that much to begin with, as we rarely have his kind of soda in the house, but he was happy and was able to earn the rest of his $100.

so, for Christmas, Reagan got new blocks from Santa....

 

a new doll from us....





Noah a new lightsaber from Santa....

 

and he LOVES his new wii....








Overall, it was the perfect day. We spent time with family and with each other. I feel incredibly blessed to have such perfect, sweet children. They make me laugh more than they make me cry. :) I wouldn't want my life any other way.

not quite on the same page

It's funny to me how sometimes Aaron and I will handle things sooo differently.

for example, a few weeks ago. when we got home from church Noah asked if he could take a shower because he was really cold. when he got out of the shower he then asked if he could take a nap - a sure sign that he was getting sick. sure enough, when he woke up he had a high fever and threw-up all over the bathroom.

i don't care how much you love your child, big kid throw-up is disgusting.

anyway, as some of you know - Noah can tend to be a little... anxious about things. especially if he's sick, therefore - i tried to really down play it: you're just fine, sweetie. You just have a little upset tummy, but you're going to be okay, no worries. yes, you do feel a little warm, but that's nothing to be worried about, etc. etc.

this was helping Noah stay calm until Aaron got home from the store with medicine...

Noah: (tired, sick little voice) Dad.. I'm a little bit sick, but it's ok.

Aaron: Oh, little buddy, you're really sick.

(i give Aaron the "what are you doing???" look)

Aaron (cont.): you have a high fever and with your chills and aches, I'm pretty sure you have the flu. you're probably going to miss school for a few days.

(i no longer have time for the 'are you kidding me' look, as I'm now looking around for something to throw at Aaron)

Noah: WHAT?? I HAVE THE FLU?? (now he's crying) I can't go to school? am I dying? (lots more crying)

Aaron: (now understands the importance of 'downplay') oh, bub, you're ok, um, we'll get you some medicine and, I'm sure you'll only miss one day of school - two at the most.

Grandpa has now come in the house

Noah: GRANDPA! (more crying) I HAVE THE FLU!!! (more crying) I'M GOING TO DIE!


eventually, i convinced Noah he would be fine and would not be dying anytime soon.

I was also able to go over a few words, with Aaron, that should be avoided around Noah: very sick, the flu, deathbed illness, blood, stitches, shots, any form of amputation, 'I'll beat you silly' - even when said jokingly, it does not sound so funny when repeated by Noah to his teachers.

CLARIFICATION: 'i'll beat you silly' is from the boys playing wii. never has it meant bodily harm. just thought i'd make that clear.

A dream come true

When I say 'dream come true' I should clarify that today was Aaron's dream come true. Since we found out we were having a boy, 6 1/2 years ago, he has talked about the day he would take his son skiing. Today, it was made possible, by my friend Jayme. lets all give a big shout out to Jayme! She hooked us up with a full-day ski lesson for Noah and free passes for me and Aaron. We were very tricky and was able to put it together as a treasure hunt of sorts for the boys for Christmas. It's not an exaggeration to say that Aaron got a little emotional with the present. I won't go into details because I promised him it would not hit my blog. :)

that being said, it was really cool to see how much this meant to him.

So... we woke up this morning, my niece, Michele and Nikki, came to watch Reagan (thank you!!!!!) so we could head up to Snowbird. 20 minutes later we were parked and signing in Noah for his class. He was excited and could care less that we were leaving him. seriously - what does it take to get your kid to shed at least one tear at your departure??

before we fast forward to the end of the day with Noah, i thought I'd give you an idea of what i put Aaron through.

Aaron and i took off for the chickadee hill. yes, this hill was a challenge for me -i've skied once, 15 years ago. It's rather shocking how much your body changes from 18 to 33. good grief. needless to say, i doubt i'll be able to move much in the morning. but, it didn't matter because Aaron bought me new ski pants(90% off) and a new ski coat and hat. i must say, i looked rather fancy when i wasn't trying to actually move on the ski's.

my downfall started with the chairs. it wasn't the getting on or riding up, but more the getting off at the top.

I didn't realize, having not skied in so long, how spastically unbalanced i would be. when i stood up, to get off the ski lift, my legs moved way to quick for the rest of my body and as a result my arms went flailing, knocking Aaron pretty hard in the head. As it was early in the day, he was able to refrain from any bad words. from there, according to Aaron, we spent a painstaking 60 minutes going up and down the chickadee hill with me doing the snowplow every inch of the way. eventually, to keep his sanity, i agreed to go on the bigger hill. As far as i was concerned we might as well have been on Mount Everest. but, it didn't matter, I was going to be brave, graceful, and make it down the hill without killing anyone. (1 out of 3 isn't so bad)

this run was pretty mellow, except for 2 steep parts. the first part, i like to call my 'personal hell'. it was impossible. i gave up eventually and figured i was going to fall and it would be better to throw myself down then fall badly and brake something. the second part was going ok until 1/4 of the way down my cell phone starts ringing. Now, at this point, i'm certain Noah has fallen and broken a leg and they're calling me to come back. i'm terrified and in my effort to stop quickly and i completely lose control and go flying off the side of the run into about 4 feet of fresh powder. this is the point Aaron's bad words start because he turns to see me falling and my skis flying. once i knew i hadn't broken anything, i grabbed my phone to see it wasn't Noah, it was a friend calling to chat. when aaron made it over to help me, he was less then pleased when he found out the reason i went screaming off the mountain. i was grounded from the phone after that. We then spent the next 15 minutes trying to get me off the ground. it's not easy with 10 pound boots and 3 foot skis when you have no coordination and no sense to just unclip the boot and stand up like a normal person would. At one point aaron told me to just lift one leg really hard to get it out of the snow... i did... aaron got COVERED as snow went flying in his mouth, nose, down his jacket, etc. i would tell you what he said, but if feels as though i'm repeating myself. :)

By the time we headed back to find Noah, I had made it down the hill without falling, and true to form i raised my poles and yelled to anyone watching me "I did it!!! I didn't fall!!!" it was a triumphant moment. But, better then that - better then not taking out the 10 kids in front of me in a ski class, better then not breaking bones or running into a tree, better then any moment of the day was going to the Chickadee hill and seeing Noah...

honestly, it was the cutest thing i've ever seen. This little man skiing down the hill as though it's a perfectly natural easy thing to do. he wasn't clumsy or awkward. he was perfect.

while he went back with his class to get his report card, aaron and i did one more run down the Chickadee hill. Aaron decided to take some pictures of me actually skiing without my arms thrown out sideways and my legs practically in the splits trying to avoid any possible speed.

Here's Aaron picture of him boarding while taking pictures of me skiing.

To end the day, Aaron took his son so they could ski together down the hill. It's easy to see, watching them together, why this was a dream of Aaron's. It was the highlight of my day.

It was the perfect day.

Thank you to everyone who helped make this day possible - Jayme, for our day at Snowbird, and for Michelle, Nikki and grandma for watching Reagan. We couldn't have done it without you.

oh no he didn't

I don't know if any of you can relate to this... in my house, as soon as i get on the phone it seems as though Noah has an instant need that he must discuss with me. no, no, it can't wait. It's vital that at 4:05 pm, while i'm on the phone, he finds out if he can read in his bed at bed time, or can he take lunch to school tomorrow, or he just needs to tell me that someday when he gets married he's going to have a dog. whatever the reason, it's important and absolutely cannot wait for me to get off the phone.

yesterday was no exception, although - he did take it one step farther.

I was on my cell phone with the cable company and Noah comes in the room....

noah: mom.

i ignore him as i talk on the phone.

noah: mom. (pause) mom. (pause) excuse me mom.

i give him the 'not while i'm on the phone' look.

noah: (using a loud whisper - as if that's any better) m-o-m.

me: (whispering) not now, i'll be off in just a sec. don't interrupt.

noah: (totally exasperated, but still whispering) uuuggghhh - mom, i need to talk to you.

At this point i turn away from him as i'm wrapping up the call. this takes a few seconds when my other line starts beeping. i thank the customer service guy for his help and quickly click over to the incoming call.

me: hello.

noah: excuse me, mom, can i have a cheese stick?

i turn around to see noah on our land line. yes, he had called my cell thinking that would be a more effective way interrupt.


thankfully, being the patient and calm mother that i am, i was able to explain to him the error of his ways with a minimal amount of bad words. 2, 3 tops.

so soon?

The other day i was volunteering in noah's class. the teacher started the morning by telling the kids she had an announcement. she said that while it's great to have friends, even best friends, it is not ok to have a BFF club (for my mom - that's Best Friends Forever). Furthermore, it is not ok to have a club where you charge other kids to be in it.

apparently, there is a group of girls who started a BFF club and are charging other kids to be in it. seriously - i can't believe that's happening in first grade. but it's not just that, noah came home and told me that his friend was 'pissed off at him'. really? 'pissed off'?? how is he learning that so fast. i would never talk like that around him, and yet 5 months into first grade and he's learning all sorts of new things. i must admit, watching him grow up so fast terrifies me. where's my little boy who loved Thomas the Train and wanted to snuggle in the afternoons? i know he's only 6, but it feels like tomorrow he'll be 20 and i have such a short time to make sure he's ready.

 

as for Reagan... i blinked and she went from rolling to walking. Thankfully, all i have to worry about right now is teaching her what's socially acceptable and what's not.

 

easier said than done.

yes, Reagan can date - when she turns 24

Having a little girl has changed all the rules. i know it doesn't sound fair, blah, blah, blah - but i don't care - i would be totally happy if Reagan waited to date until after she finished college. i know that's an unrealistic wish, but in the meantime, i can secretly follow her on all her dates. nothing wrong with being a concerned mother. And just to be safe, we've decided to have any boy who wants to date our daughter pass the application process.
(my favorite is rule #6)


APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER NOTE: This application will be considered incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________
HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________
SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________
HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No
B. A truck with over sized tires? __Yes __No
C. A waterbed? __Yes __No
D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No
E. A tattoo? __Yes __No
F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __No Pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring? (IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)

ESSAY SECTION:
In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you? ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you? ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you? ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________


REFERENCES SECTION:
Church you attend ___________________________________________________
How often you attend ________________________________________________
When would be the best time to interview your: Father? ________Mother? _______ Pastor? _______


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:
Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want to be shot would be: ______________________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my: ______________________________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:___________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is: ______________________________________________________________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________ ______________________________________________________________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is: ______________________________________________________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, AND RED HOT POKERS.

Applicant's signature __________________________

Mother's signature _____________________________
Father's Signature _____________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman ________________________________

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write. If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)


To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating....

Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my air nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "Barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: "early."

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge . Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness.. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless destroyer of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me!

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over the rice paddies south of Saigon. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

Rugby game

America's rugby team, the Eagles, came to Utah to play against Uruguay. Aaron couldn't have been happier. we had front row seats, right in the center, the weather wasn't too bad and thankfully we had an absolutely wasted rugby fan right behind us to keep us thoroughly entertained. But more about him later.

first of all, it's quite irritating when a rugby player has better hair than me. i don't care how good he is, it's just not right!

 

 

And to run around, letting it swing side to side, flying in the air - full of bounce and body, was like a knife to my back. cruel, cruel world.

 

But, then i saw Captain American and realized that the drunk guy behind me was right - FREEDOM - was all that mattered. not having thick, long, naturally curly hair... just freedom. (by the end of the game he couldn't remember who was playing anymore so he just started yelling, "FREEDOM".)

 

when i finally got over my jealousy of Fabio - i mean Todd Clever (who not only has great hair, but is also the captain of the Eagles and was awarded the Men's Rugby Player of the Year) i realized i had used what remained of our camera battery. thankfully, the man upstairs had some mercy (and to prevent aaron from killing me) i had enough juice to get one great shot of the game we were actually there to watch.

 

The Eagles won. Aaron was happy. I learned that Freedom is what matters. It was a great night for rugby.

Family pictures '08

My niece is a photographer and is starting to build up her clientele. So we thought we'd give her a try and couldn't have been happier. she did a great job - as you can see. she found a really cool place in Alpine and was very patient with our kids. we actually got 2 CD's of pictures from her (just over 100 pics) so i tried to go through and pick some of my favorites.