Wednesday, August 20, 2008

conversations with a 6-year-old

Some conversations seem to make me cringe, laugh, want to pull my hair out or just laugh out loud.

Lately, Noah, seems to think we can't understand what he's trying to tell us... frankly - at times - we have no clue.

Noah: Mom, when will lunch be ready?

Brenda: In four minutes. (very precise - i know - but i've got this mac & cheese thing down to a science)

Noah: How long is that?

Brenda: four minutes.

Noah: No - i mean, how LONG is that?

Brenda: i told you - four minutes.

Noah: ugh - i know that's what you said, i'm asking - how long until it's time to eat?

Brenda: sweetheart (maybe not said very sweetly) i told you lunch would be ready in FOUR minutes. that's 240 seconds - start counting and when you're done... lunch will be ready.

Noah: ahhh, why aren't you understanding what i'm saying??? i know you said it will be done in four minutes - but what i'm asking is - how long is that?

Brenda: Noah, i love you. go to your room and i'll call you when lunch is ready and then you'll know how long four minutes is.

Noah: (as he's heading to his room) this is not fair! four minutes is like a whole hour and that's going to take forever!! i'm never going to get to eat. this is the worst day EVER!


Aaron - unfortunately - does not get off so easy....

let me set the scene for you: it's time for dinner, we're trying to figure out what we want to eat. since i have yet to go to the store, we have next to nothing to fix for dinner. Noah hears us talking and comes in and wants to play a game as to what we'll have. he wants each of us to name three things and if any of us name the same thing we'll have that to eat. i tried to explain that we don't have that many things to choose from and right now it's between pancakes and quesadilla's. noah starts getting really upset that we won't play his game and starts yelling. that's when aaron steps in, takes him to his room and has a chat. i'm sitting on the couch with Reagan and this is what i hear...

Aaron: first of all - you do not get to yell at your parents, do you understand?

Noah: yes, but i want to play my game for what we'll eat and you're not listening!

Aaron: i know you want to play a game, but it's not going to happen tonight...

Noah: but dad...

Aaron: and furthermore, you need to figure out that you are not in charge around here. we're your parents and we are in charge.

*** let me interject - it is my firm belief that if you have to tell your child he's not in charge... then you already have a problem on your hands ***

Noah: that's not fair! why can't i be the parent and be in charge?

Aaron: Because we made you, that's why. and because we made you that makes us the parents.

Noah: (big pause)

*** Brenda on the couch rolling her eyes, waiting for the inevitable question***

Noah: what do you mean you MADE me? what does that mean?

Aaron: (a bigger pause) um, when you were in mom's tummy, we made you there and that makes us the parents.

Noah: what do you mean YOU made me in mom's tummy? how did YOU make ME? i want to know dad, how did you make me.

*** Brenda is now laughing quietly on the couch, making no effort to help Aaron in anyway ***

Aaron: (wondering how the conversation went from pancakes and quesadilla's to the birds and the bees) Noah, it doesn't matter. we're not talking about this anymore, i'm the dad and i'm making quesadilla's. (with that aaron walks out of noah's bedroom, throws me a 'what are you laughing at' look, and heads to the kitchen.

Noah: (not deterred that easily) i'm serious dad - i want to know how you made me.

*** at this point i do step in and tell noah he can come and watch TV until dinner is ready. with that, the birds and the bees are forgotten as noah is flipping to his favorite channel ***


you just have to love conversations with your 6-year-old.

6 comments:

Kristina P. said...

If I had a six year-old, I'm sure this is exactly how my conversation would be.

Sylvia said...

i'm so glad....

-i'm not the only one whose kid yells at them
-i'm not the only one who has the quesadilla/pancake dilemma sometimes (okay, like twice a week. whatever.)

thanks for being so real!!!

Carrie said...

Well, at 5 our oldest was called "Sexy Jane" on the playground and wanted to know exactly what that meant. Now at 8, while watching "Empire Strikes Back," she started worrying that Luke are Leah were going to "get it on" and that's a big problem because they're brother and sister....and that is yucky! Its interesting that we have not specifically had "the talk"...maybe she already got that one on the playground, too.

Sara Walker said...

Brenda, I love your life!! You have the funniest things and conversations, thanks for sharing them all and making me laugh. You are the best sister-in-law in the world.

Anna said...

Thanks for sharing. Don't you wish you could know how their minds work! I love it!

Out of the blue yesterday, Thomas asked me how babies get out your stomach!

Alicia said...

Okay, the best part of that is the part where Noah says "This is the worst day EVER!" because I remember hearing him say that on occasion in VA. :) Oh, how I miss my little friends!