so, i'm sitting by noah - just minding my own business - when he reaches up and starts patting my arm, just under my shoulder. then he starts squeezing it - evidently it was very entertaining for him because he starts laughing and says, "mom, you're arm is so chunky".
now - if i only had friends that were so honest. but instead, being the amazing, sweet, full-of-crap, wonderful friends that they are - i hear things like "you look great!" i know they say this because that's what friends say and no one wants to be the 'honest' friend who makes you cry. i get that. the problem is, that part of my brain - you know, the one that craves sweets and makes all kinds of justifications for eating so poorly - it needs little encouragement, so when someone tells me i look good, it's not long before it has me believing that my metabolism is magic and i can eat crappy and still look fabulous! thankfully, i have a six-year-old son who keeps me level headed and fully aware of what reality really is.
for the record, this time i would like to blame my 'chunky arms' on a certain friend, let's call her "megan", who thinks she can bring over a plate of mint brownies but instead of giving them to me - she "gives" them to noah. come on! who are we kidding here? it's all about the number of brownies to noah - not the size. so if i eat one, two, maybe even three after he's gone to bed... it doesn't matter, i just cut the remaining ones in half and there's just as many when he wakes up as there was when he went to bed. so, in the future, "megan", you might as well just bring the brownies for me and save me the guilt of robbing from my own child. (i almost said 'don't bring mint brownies over until i've gotten rid of my chunky arms, but that thought was way too sad to write.)
10 comments:
You never cease to make me laugh! Road Show is over on Saturday, so maybe I'll be able to post something! Love ya. Sara
Yeah, my arms aren't the only things that are chunky. I'm pretty sure that cupcake I just had helped much.
Okay, I don't say things I don't mean. You really do look great! I just topped off 4, yes 4, M&M cookies and a plate full of nachoes (does that make you feel not so alone?) It was my afternoon snack...
The other night I sat on my rear end and polished off a 1.5 lb bag of animal crackers.
You're not alone, my friend.
I'm not sure just how fair you are to your friends. I mean just because some of us might like to offer you cupcakes or brownies or the remnants of cupcakes so you attempt to make your own doesn't mean that we aren't honest and really want to aid you in all your pursuits. Take this friend, for example, I want to help turn you into Martha Stewart and Richard Simmons at the same time. I don't simply give you pistachio cream filling for your spice cake, I also encourage you to drip drops of sweat while doing lunge after lunge after lunge at the gym.
i really do have the greatest friends!!! i love that you all eat like crap just to help me feel better.
kristina - when it's 2 or 3 cupcakes... creme filled (curse you carrie)... for breakfast - we'll talk more then. (you should check out carrie's blog sometime.)
talai - cookies and nachoes??? i love it. i love it even more that it was an afternoon snack!!! i knew i'd pull you over to the dark side sooner or later. when are you coming to UT next?
sylvia - seriously... have i told you how much i love you?
carrie - not one - but two different kinds of cupcakes filled with gooey goodness that i can't get enough of - my willpower never stood a chance. you are responsible for my chunky right arm - meg is definitely resposible for my chunky left. unfortanetly, i have no one to blame but me for the rest of this squishy body. however, i do give you credit for those *@&*@!# lunges that make me sweat and hurt - without those, who knows what i'd look like. i curse you and love you at the same time. very confusing.
Love the new background!!
All right, all right, all right! Don't blame me! I was just trying to reward sweet sweet Noah for a job well done. I had no (absolutely positively NO!)idea that those delicious, chocolaty, minty, delectably irresistible brownies would end up in your mouth. Totally not my intention. Please accept my apology. (hey, by the way, I've got some left over fruit pizza with cream cheese frosting, orange glaze, and a chewy sugar cookie crust...want some? for Noah, of course)
oh, Megan, do you really think anyway is going to believe that load of chet? seriously, woman. only someone without any kind of feelings or emotions could have kept those brownies out of her mouth. AND - if that wasn't enough - you come over with that fruit pizza with it's flakey crust and sugary goodness... for Noah of course. who, i might add, has been very clear on the fact that it is for him and only him, but he will share one bite. so sad he has no idea what really happens in the kitchen once he goes to bed.
but, to thank you for all your delicious generosity and support in my wieght loss adventure - i will be sure to drop off a few strawberries and cream frappuccino's this week, and the next, and the next... for Sophie, of course.
my life has come full circle. Brenda just used my catch phrase "chet" in her blogging sphere.
love the chet outta you, baby.
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